Let there be light

For the Thursday Challenge .. LIGHTS (Holiday Lights, Candles, Street Lights, Fireplace, Fireworks,...). That's the most recent one -- our very own Christmas tree.

I hereby resolve…

It’s that time of the year again and I'm sitting to think about my game-plan for 2011. Here’s what I’ve thought of…

It's nice to be in touch.
All pics courtesy Google images

1. Make time for family and friends… not the kids and the husband… the extended family… uncles, aunts, friends, cousins, nieces, nephews. I find myself too wrapped up in my immediate self-- my kids, my house, my gym. It’s time to look beyond. During my growing up years my cousins, aunts and uncles and some of my dad’s friends (who were all chachas and chachis not uncles and aunties) were all family to me. The cousins were ‘brothers and sisters’ not ‘cousins’. We wrote letters, exchanged cards and waited desperately for the summer when we’d be together. We have a great family on both sides of the family tree and it would be unfortunate if the kids counted just The Husband and I as family. The mission this year then… get in touch with people who matter and get the kids to know them too.. visits, calls, anecdotes, pictures.. every way I can.

I hope to climb on without hesitation

2. Lose weight. Last year I had resolved to join a gym and I did but I barely lost any weight. This year that’s not going to be enough. I am giving myself a target.. six kgs through the year. It would have been five but it’s tough math to spread it through four quarters.. so six.. which means 1.5 kgs a quarter… doable certainly. I’ll keep the updates coming.

I want those figures! Pun intended totally.

3. Make money. That’s another one from last year. I did manage to get back to some professional writing this year. In 2011, however, rather than the now on now off freelancing, the idea is to get into something more organized. That needs some figuring out and I’m working on it.





4. And finally the one last devil I’ll try to beat this year yet again… procrastination. God help me with this one… call the carpenter NOW, clean the kids’ room NOW, call that friend NOW, chuck the lousy maid NOW.. and that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

This is so me I had to put it on.

Now that’s what I call a rocking Christmas

Isn’t it funny how sometimes nothing goes according to plan yet everything turns out fine. And so it was that we had a wonderful Christmas party.

First it was the venue. We wanted to have the party in the society clubhouse but were denied permission because no ‘religious’ functions were allowed. It’s not like we were planning on having mass or anythingL. We were told we could have a party but not a ‘Christmas Party’. So it shouldn’t be on the 24^th, there should be no Santa, no tree, no gifts. We found another venue before we lost our heads over the mindless suggestions. A friend’s place it had to be.

Preparations for the party got underway. The cake was ordered, the sandwiches sampled (I enjoyed that part.. he he), the decorations were bought and the gifts chosen. We were on track.

Then some legal work came up and we had to be in Mumbai right on the 24^th. Sigh! Considering it was Government work we had no idea how long it would take. Anyway we were up at 5.30 and on our way by 6.30 so we could get back by the evening. Four hours on the road, three very very long hours at the Registry office (where the kids drove us up the wall) and then another four hours on the road and we were back home. Rush rush rush … bath, dry hair, dress up and walk out all in half hour and we were at the party right in time.

Then the guy who was supposed to deliver sandwiches backed out. Dominoes came to our rescue with prompt service and super hot pizzas.

The Christmas Tree looked beautiful. The red and white balloons, the streamers, the carols and above all the kids dressed in their brilliant reds turned everything Christmasy. The home was warm and cosy. We’re glad we were ditched by the clubhouse.

We started off with musical chairs. It was a funny kind of ‘ruleless’ game. The kids cris- crossed across and between the chairs. They ran around them and wouldn’t stop even when the music stopped. They sat when they wanted to. They refused to be eliminated -- the eliminated ones simply carried their chairs and got back in the game.

Then we thought we’d try the ‘statue’ game.. where they had to freeze when the music stopped. It was the same story all over again and so we left them to dance while we caught up with each other.

Next morning Santa delivered the long-awaited gifts and was thanked over and over again with promises of being good ‘all of next year’. The evening was time for a family get-together. While Hrit watched the telly Santa hopped over again and deposited the gifts right under his nose without him catching a glimpse of the much loved old man. The poor boy has been going nuts trying to figure out how he did it. Pat on the back for smart mama J.

Then surprise surprise my 9-year-old niece managed to put the twins to sleep while we adults had a peaceful dinner.

I made up for my sad Diwali with a rocking Christmas. Happiness is complete.

Four Books

Since we shifted this year my reading took a beating what with the settling down and looking for a Library that dished out more than just Bestsellers.

However, thanks to Flipkart I’m on a fast track again. Last month I ordered four books -- Parul Sharma’s By the Water Cooler (BTWC) (Parul is someone who’s blog I follow and enjoy immensely), Keep the Change (KTC) by Nirupma Subramaniam, Beautiful from This Angle (BFTA) by Maha Khan Philips and Girl in Translation (GIT) by  Jean Kwok. Coincidentally all four books are by women authors and have women protagonists.

The first two proved to be quick, fun, one-time reads. They are interesting in their similarity. Both deal with girls thrown in competitive work atmospheres. BTWC’s Mini is a Brand Manager while KTC’s Damayanthi is a Chennai accountant both trying to find their feet in Mumbai. Both have mothers super anxious to get them married and settled. Both have fleeting affairs with handsome hunks only to find true love later.

I loved BTWC for its interesting characters… Tanya who obsessively plans her wedding, the anorexic Vaishali, Mumtaz the detective, Subbu the quintessential accountant, the bitchy boss Shipra. Besides, some of her lines really made me laugh. “.. her eyes were those of a Shark, not missing a single detail of my dress or appearance, assuming sharks were interested in that kind of thing." Typically Parul.

I must confess though that I enjoyed KTC more. The protagonist Damayanthi is better etched out. She and her saucy ‘Little Voice’ make for a good read.

Both books are funny, sure, yet predictable, too predictable. Like I said quick, one-time reads with simple happy endings that’s all.

BFTA is set in high society Pakistan. It is about three friends, party queen Amynah Farooqui, Mumtaz Malik daughter of a drug baron and the image conscious, conservative Henna daughter of a prominent Pakistani politician. When Amynah’s friend Monty produces a hit reality show Who Wants to Be a Terrorist, Mumtaz too decides to make a documentary on violence again women to cash in on the international trend of Pakistan bashing. Amynah agrees to help and they rope in Henna. They make a documentary with a girl called Nilofer, who is not really as much of a victim as she pretends to be.

The documentary goes on to be a superhit and from then on things get complicated driving the friends apart. I found the book engrossing if for nothing else than the Pakistani angle. It’s a country that fascinates me for obvious reasons.

Besides, I’d never read about the Pakistani elite before. Amynah the protagonist is by far the most interesting character. She’s happy writing a totally fake book on oppressed women in Pakistan. Yet, it’s not that she doesn’t have a conscience, she just doesn’t want to complicate life by thinking too much. She keeps is simple.. goes to parties, snorts coke, has some casual sex for fun and crashes at home nursing hangovers. An interesting read but I kind of expected more when I started out.

Now for the Girl in Translation. If BFTA was about the rich of a poor country, GIT is about the poor of a rich country. The book traces the journey of a young Chinese girl Kim after she migrates to the US with her mother. She knows just a smattering of English, while her mother knows none. But she has an advantage in that she’s an extraordinary student. The story traces her journey as she overcomes financial, social and emotional odds to become a surgeon.

As I read the book what struck me first was that a ‘good traditional Chinese’ girl is quite similar to an Indian one, and that’s what makes it tough for Kim to fit in.

The description of abject poverty is startling in its detail. The grueling work schedule, the low wages, the cockroaches and rats in Kim and her mother’s dilapidated apartment and above all the lack of heating … the cold that forces them to sleep with the oven switched on all night… the cold got to me the most.

What’s better GIT satisfied my penchant for happy endings. This is the one I enjoyed most.

Waiting for the next lot from Flipkart. Meanwhile the hunt for the library is still on.

Angels, Demons and Santa



Pic: Google imges


It's Santa season. All of December I take a back seat and every threat and bribe is channeled through him. "Drink up your milk or Santa wont get you a gift", "Keep your specs on or Santa wont get a gift for you", "Too much TV and Santa wont..", on and on.

My ever thoughtful daughter wondered what I was getting for Christmas..
Naisha: Mama what is santa getting for you?
Me: I don't know what do you think he should get?
Naisha: (After much thought) I think I'll ask him to get you ten nailpaints. (Point to be noted: 10 is the hugest number in her imagination and nail paints the ideal gift)
Me: But I hardly wear nail paint, what'll I do with ten?
Naisha: ummmm... then I think I'll ask him to get you a pink laptop.

Indeed the ideal gift!
********

Pic: Google images

One specially bad day when I was low on patience and Hrit was completely out of control I introduced him to the angel and demon. I told him they both lived in his head. Each time he did something naughty the devil would become stronger and each time he did something nice the angel would become stronger. Finally one of the two would take over completely depending on how he behaved.
To my surprise he took it all a bit too seriously. Now when he does something naughty all I have to do is feel his head pretending to look for horns, or his bottom to 'check' for a tail. And he completely freaks out. Heh heh heh... Gotcha Hrit boy.
Ah the pleasures of motherhood.

For the love of reading

Okay so I came across this reading challenge and had to sign up. Of course I love reading.. have always loved reading. Any writing that I have ever done is credited to my love for reading. So this is surely my kind of thing.

Besides, the kids are four and a half now and over the next two years I'm looking at shaking off the 'obsessivemom' tag which means I need to get back to the loves of my my pre-kid days. South Asian Challenge 2011 here I come. This is a fun challenge started by S Krishna where you pledge to read a certain number of books by South Asian writers through the year. I'm signing up for 10 books ... I'm sure I will top that but I want to keep it conservative since it's my first year. If you're interested in joining up click here.

Reclaiming life

This post won the 'Life Changing Device' contest on Blogadda. Got a Philips MP 3 Player for this one. Yay! The contest was judged by Kunal Sheth. You can read the other award winning entries here.



Since I started working I’ve changed cities pretty regularly. Each time I’ve looked forward to the move with great excitement. Setting up a brand new house while we stayed at the hotel was always fun. I would take a short break then start job hunting – new job, new friends, new beginnings.

However this time when the husband announced our time at Mumbai was up I had a sinking feeling. Setting up the house would be a nightmare with two four-year-olds getting underfoot. There was to be no job since I’d turned a stay-at-home-mom. We’d been in Mumbai since the kids were born and now I was to going to lose my entire support system – my friends who’d seen me through the toughest times and my trustee maid. I was leaving behind my whole world.

Just as I’d feared, the move was traumatic. The first month went by in a whirl of carpenters and plumbers. I struggled with a house that refused to run smoothly, maids who didn’t cooperate and kids who were … well.. busy being kids. And, I had no friends. The city was not new to me.. yet all my old friends were working. My mommy world didn’t connect with their media world.

Writing used to be my way to unwind and I’d started blogging right after the twins were born. The blog was for me.. just me. However, in this new house our study was at one end of the house and I couldn’t leave the kids and disappear for some ‘me’ time. The one pleasure of my life became inaccessible. It couldn’t get worse, I thought.

Alone, depressed and overworked I was nearing break point.

Some time back we had subscribed to a holiday package (which BTW we’ve never used thanks to the workaholic husband). Along with that package we got a complimentary laptop. My husband suggested I make use of it. I’m really not a technology freak. I figure out just about enough to keep myself going. The comp was an old friend but a laptop…? Desperation drew me to that dust-ridden carton in the loft. The laptop was out. I struggled to work without a mouse and surprisingly within days I was comfortable. Soon I found myself reveling in the freedom of the laptop and a wifi connection. They accompanied me to the kids’ room, the balcony, the dining table, the living room… wherever the kids chose to play. I was writing.... furiously.

Picture courtesy Google Images

That was the first step. Then I began to connect with other mothers. I found Parul who had a book to her credit despite a four-year-old and a baby (now she has two, books, I mean), Mad Momma and Rohini, also moms with two kids each who held full time jobs and surprise surprise there was momofrs who had twins just like me. They were in their terrible twos and she was a working mom. There was Y who has a young daughter followed by twins.. gasp. Could it get any tougher?

They all generously opened the doors of their hearts and their homes to me through their blogs. It felt like family. I could talk about my son’s tantrums and my daughter’s homework issues without fear of being judged. Oh I know they weren’t reading my blog but I was reading their’s and when I wrote I felt I was talking to them all… like I had ‘friends’ out there. They had the same issues, unruly kids and absconding maids included. And they talked about much more.. book reviews, films, family functions, issues, impressions. They were out there doing it all. Maybe I could too.

And then I discovered blog directories. For the first time I entered a contest and found myself attempting to write something NOT to do with my kids in a long time – a first since I quit my job. That was the icing on the cake. Then I actually won the contest .. talk about the cherry on the icing.

Coincidentally around the same time a few of my articles/stories were selected for various publications and I was actually paid for them.. hah. I was on a roll.. damn I AM on a roll. I have more virtual friends than real ones. I’m not sure that’s healthy but at least they’ve kept me sane.

My laptop and the wifi, that’s where it all started, that’s how I reclaimed my life.

Check out Buytheprice.com and connect with Indian Bloggers at BlogAdda .

When beans grow on trees

Gardens and gardening have been an integral part of my childhood. My dad used to be a passionate gardener with a special love for roses. I watched as he busied himself budding and grafting. When the soil of our new garden wasn’t good enough mom and he sieved the entire soil of the flower beds adding quantities of sand to make it just right for those precious roses. Come winter and they showed up in all their glory. Winter was indeed special with the seasonals in full bloom too. Hollyhocks, Sweat Peas, Antirrhinums, Calendulas, Pansies, Chrysanthemums.. the entire range was there. We had a swing in our garden and we’d spend long hours of lazy winter days lounging about in the sun, the grass warm under us reading and chatting.

At home now, in my flat, the garden seems far away. What’s worse, I suffer from a complete black thumb. Of all the plants I’ve ever tried to plant only ten odd ones have stubbornly refused to die on me.. none of which are flowering plants. Hence there was great excitement in the house when the Tulsi planter decided to play host to a Periwinkle. The said Periwinkle seemed to have woken up with a start after a year of deep slumber then decided to bloom with a vengeance to make up for lost time.

The honoured guest

The kids have been delirious with joy rushing to the plant right after school and dragging their dad to the scene of action as soon as he entered the house. That was followed with a desperate desire to grow their own ‘plants’. I was game for this lesson in agriculture.

Some rajmah beans were sourced, two bowls were lined with cotton wool, water poured and the beans made to nestle gently on their royal seats. Naisha also insisted on making a cotton wool ‘blanket’ for her seeds. Of course name tags had to be made.. sharing being an alien concept despite their mama trying to rub it in from the moment they were born.. sigh.

Naisha's are under the 'blanket'

While I rambled about roots and shoots and air and sunlight they were on their own trip. Here’s how the conversation went…

Naisha : Hrit bhai when do you think the plants will come out?

Hrit: Kal niklenge.

Naisha: What will we do when it becomes a tree? The bowl will break.

Hrit: Mine will be taller.

Naisha: Par aap mere ped ke fruits mat toriyega. We’ll collect lots and lots of fruits.

Tree? Fruit? I’m hoping their interest wanes before the expected ‘trees’ come up.

Edited to add: Better sense prevailed and all the Rajmah seeds were dumped into a single bowl. Hrit called his freinds and told them proudly.. "Look we are making our own trees.. we just need lajma, cotton and water".

To be ten again

Bo Derek once said quite famously… ‘Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping’. I couldn’t agree more. Shopping really is therapeutic. What’s better I needn’t be shopping for myself.. it could be for anyone.

Yesterday I had a great excuse, no not excuse… reason to shop, it being my niece’s birthday. Time was short, the maid had bunked yet again and I just had an hour before I had to pick the kids. I rushed to Landmark thinking I’d quickly pick some books. Once there I realized nothing was going to happen ‘quickly’.

After ages I found myself browsing the preteen section and it was like opening a long forgotten treasure box… like being at a party filled with some long lost pals and some extremely fascinating strangers. Among the old friends Enid Blyton still seemed to rule. Famous Five and Secret Seven were everywhere. Then there was Caroleen Keen where Nancy Drew had turned younger. In our time she was a teenager now however, she’d gone much younger, an eight-year-old ND….. seemed kind of strange.

There was Meg Cabot of Princess Diary fame along with a host of books on teen Diva Hannah Montanna. And there were many more interesting titles like No Boys Allowed! by Marilyn Levinson, Agent Amelia - The Case of the Ghost Diamond by Michael Broad , Airmail to the Moon by Tom Birdseye. I just wanted to be ten again. As for the gift … I was a bit lost first then decided to stick to the tried and tested. Enid Blyton it was.

Hope the birthday girl enjoys the read. Along the way I grabbed a Barbie too. My niece has over a score of those dolls and to her credit she lavishes them with plenty of love and affection. Her birthday gift could never be complete without the mandatory Barbie.

We’re in it together

This specs thing is proving not quite easy. Hrit is handling them well enough it’s me who has the problem.  You see I have been wearing specs since my graduation days. However after the kids were born I kind of gave them up. It was tough to keep them on with the twins around and I wasn’t much on the comp anyway. Besides, I could see well enough with one eye and life was fine. I got used to it. Now however Hrit has struck a pact with me, (without bothering for a nod from me of course) “I’ll wear mine when you wear yours”. So now I’ve got to keep them on.

Last night he carefully placed his in the case and then said, “Mama where’s the box for your glasses?” Now God only knows where it was. He saw me looking for it and then gallantly offered me his case, squeezing both our glasses together. Finally I fished out the case for my glares and he was satisfied, carefully placing the two cases side by side. “Same same, no mama?” he said with his delightful heart warming Hrit bhai smile.
BTW I hate it when Hrit calls it his 'chasma'. When will he master the 'sh'?

That was before the 'accident'

Edited to add: Hrit’s has broken his first pair of glasses. Apparently he was trying to see how far he could bend them before they snapped. He added, “The lens came out like a rocket, mama.” His specs were just one straight line when he brought them to me. Sigh! Another chore to do.